Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Language

Some things I've really come to like about the Japanese language (and by extension, culture?):
apologizing instead of saying thank you,
saying you're going to "receive the favor of being allowed to do something" rather than that you're "going to do it,"
and finally,
things go zaku-zaku.

and...

and I also get the feeling that it's not just going to come around, but
that I'm helping to make all this come around too.

(breakthroughs today)

Okay

Okay, enough sitting around, it's time for me to get off my butt and actually start doing this music thing. I'm here now, completely situated and loving every bitter and heavenly moment, so what better time? Lotus Plaza and the possibility of getting a car and license again, plus the realization of how close everything is around here if you actually do use a car, are inspiring me. As well as hearing from a good friend about all the music endeavors he's excited about pursuing on his own. Of course, this inspiration to undergo such an expensive, time-consuming, and devotion-requiring project of an experience is peaking at a time when I do not have a stable income or job, but it seems to me, like if things keep going the way they are, something very good is going to come around sooner or later. and I think sooner.

(Lotus Plaza)

Today

Today was such a cool day filled with so many good experiences. I so made the right decision to come back here. There is still so much for me to experience here!

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Blegh

Blegh for another example of how white people in Japan are full of it. It's amazing how some people can completely construct their own world to live in while physically being surrounded by other actual, real people. No matter how much they move locations, they seem to relate to their surroundings in their signature, constantly ego-centric way. Maybe more on this later, when I'm not so eager to go to bed.

P.S. Today was pretty intense and full of experiences. Think: the smelliest town in the world and navigating the stormy seas of Japanese bureaucracy with a constantly improving ship known as my Japanese!

(Roy Orbison's "Love Hurts")

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Life

Life is so wonderous and amazing, even as it is so sorrowful and distressing.

I am excited, in part because I have no idea what's coming. But I'm taking hold of something and going.

Friday, September 25, 2009

Rice

Two cups of Spanish rice equals food for a very, very long time. :)

Monday, September 21, 2009

Music Stuff

(I really have a bunch of stuff I want to talk and write about, but for now I'll just say:)

Randomly getting back into Cibo Matto makes me also randomly get back in Gorillaz. Then I realized: I love anything that intersects with Miho Hattori or Damon Albarn. Are these bands to which I'm destined to always come back?

Yes, I'm back in Japan. I enjoyed my time/vacation back at home more than I thought I would and almost didn't want to come back, but now I'm back and happy to be so ^o^

I've also been thinking a lot about what to do in the future of me and my education. All I can come up with is: I WANT TO DO EVERYTHING!! Well, I may have a little more direction than that, but not too much.

Also been going back and forth between how much hope there is for humanity to go in a more positive direction rather than just descend into further depravity. It always hits me pretty deeply when I hear about unimaginably horrible things happening, usually done by fellow humans, to innocent human beings. I'm talking about the murder of Annie Le. Ugh, and with all the tons of police cars I saw all over L.A., the instantly apparent and familiar U.S. culture (?) of pushing violence further and further and of doing and taking as much as you can because it's your right, contrasted with recent thoughts about the U.S. as less of a country and more of an anchorless, foundationless experiment taking us all with it as it spins through space and hell...For crying out loud, I listened to some of my own relatives talking about how the bad guy "really tears 'em up" in some new horror movie and describing with excitement all the gruesome ways he dismembers innocent people. I mean...this cannot be natural.

I don't feel completely at ease with the point of view that things are better now than they used to be, just because we've "come a long ways." But I suppose I also don't know much. Maybe it's fruitless to think about whether things are better now than they used to be, but the thought keeps coming to mind that the "culture" that we have in the U.S. is just not healthy for humans.

I also recently had the thought that the worst thing those in control can do is make us think we're at the end of history. But damn, if we're up against "people" who can do that...

For some reason I got into this odd state of mind these past couple of months that says things in terms of colonization are better than they used to be across the world just because (?). I've been coming out of that and thinking about nearly everything in terms of colonialism and neo-colonialism. The difference this time is I feel more collected, a little more positive, and like I have a better comprehension, or grip, on these ideas now. I'd like to try thinking in another paradigm, though.

To do something to help the world, do I go with what's been coming to my head most naturally thus far, or go in a newer, interesting direction? (I ask myself)

To change the topic...I love Korean Air. The last time I rode it was three (?) years ago when I was leaving to study abroad in Japan and Pomona's study abroad fund was paying the bill. Imagine my delight when I found this normally extremely expensive airline to be the 2nd cheapest for my trip back to Japan this week! I spent the 11 or so hours of the flight (before the transfer at Seoul) watching the equivalent of four movies and playing Tetris.

During the flight, I was really surprised to randomly stumble upon Dog Day Afternoon while channel surfing and so I watched that one and a half times. I really, really liked it, but the ending was probably one of the more terrible things I've seen (in cinema), not as in it was made badly but as in it ripped my heart apart and almost made me start to cry. If I had to introduce someone to the U.S. by media I would show them this movie. After that, I watched the first half (or so? i dont' know) of Wolverine (I don't even think that's its name), which was incredibly terrible. Have I ever seen a movie so saturated with awkward, super-masculine male bonding? ...hm, have I?...I don't know. Anyways, I realized soon that I could be watching sweet Korean movies that I never get a chance to watch but are in the airplane's movie libraries so I checked that out and came up with a winner. My Girlfriend's an Agent was really funny and had everything I needed at that moment to make me laugh: hilariously badly staged action sequences, East Asian-style xenophobic stereotypes, and great off-beat jokes. I'm very happy I saw that movie. After that I forced my soon-to-be-bloodshot eyes through another epic drama, I Corrupt All Cops. It's a Hong Kong film, I think, or at least it was about corruption in Hong Kong in the 1960s-70s, and by the looks of the characters, the Chinese title might be something like "Golden Empire"...? Anyways, it was pretty good, although the style seemed discontinuous at times. A little too violent for my tastes at some points, but even then it was done pretty well I think.

Man, I remember when airplanes didn't even have all that stuff. It still blows my mind.

And since when did this blog become a movie review site?

Well, anyways, I'm back in Japan and looking for what's next, I had a great time back at home visiting family and friends, and I'm seeing a lot of good happening in my life.

Oops, I wrote it all.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Back

Back in Japan, as of three days ago.

Monday, September 7, 2009

(Focused) Thoughts

So, that's really why people (re)invented Aztlan!

We need something new.

Saturday, September 5, 2009

Hey, pt. 2

So, here's the rest of my update:

I'm here in La La Land until the 17th of Sep., after which I gear up for Me in Japan pt. 2. Actually, this second chapter may have already begun when I ended my job, fought to keep an apartment, started looking for jobs in a foreign country not through a nice little college-style application process, underwent a massive cleanup of my place, applied for unemployment in a foreign country/language (The amount of anxiety and aversion I felt about going to the unemployment office was really surprising and I suppose ultimately understandable - I feel like not having a job, any kind of job, has got to rank up there as one of the most shameful things for someone raised pretty traditionally Mexican-American), and took my trip back home.

I'm really excited for this next part, especially thinking about how much I've learned in what's actually only been a month since my occupation came to a screeching end. New priorities include: focusing on languages more, reading a lot more (this might mean some inner negotiating with my cheap self who doesn't want to pay for shipping books transcontinentally, unless I can figure out another way...), and thinking more specifically about where to take my formal education next. All while continuing to live and learn to move with the flow, which has been cool so far.

I came back home and found my old Kind of Blue CD that my jazz band teacher gave me when I graduated from middle school. This album is so good. I've been listening to it every morning (I keep waking up at sunrise) (although today I listened to Carsick Cars). Amazing how you come to appreciate things over time.

Haha, I just talked to my grandma over the phone right now. Here's an excerpt from her telling me about a senior citizens' travel group trip to Washington D.C.: "Oh yeah, over there they have that thing for the, what do you call them, the soldados, you know where they have the names of all the soldiers that died. That sounds interesting. I don't really want to go to the White House or nothing like that. I don't know if they're gonna make us go there if we're in a group, but you know, they're all caca-heads over there. You know, we vote and vote and vote, and it doesn't matter if they're black, or white, or Mexican, you know, they don't do anything." I love my grandma so much :)

Some of the things I've been happiest about experiencing again since being back:
beans Mexicano style, tortillas, being able to make quesadillas at home easily, my charango, my accordion, a picture of my dad my sister put on the fridge that has the caption, "Hey! Watchate!" by it, my mom's cooking, my dog Chloe!!, concrete and asphault outside, Los Angeles air (okay, not just the smog, smoke, and exhaust, but you know...the atmosphere and wind as cars go by and...you know what I mean, right?!), seeing so many different types of people all together!, beautiful brown people walking on the street and sitting on their porches, having my dad show me all the Japanese Buddhist temples in Boyle Heights, doing a "refresher course" of some of my family's usual hangout spots (plus some new ones!!, which include the Korean chain cafe and bakery Paris Baguette), and you know, just seeing family in general. It's been nice. I'm really surprised at how relaxed I feel. This is really a good vacation. And a good trip home. I'm glad I made it. I'm glad I'm here.

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Initial Reactions

Everything is big!!, service here sucks!, I'm not sweating constantly, convenience stores are more aesthetically pleasing here. :)

Hey

Hey, I've been really bad about letting people know, but I'm in L.A. now. It's nice.