It's been a long, time...

Hey, last post was post 47, how about that!?

Now, I have had a lot of experiences since we last spoke. The koto performance was good. It was not at all what I was expecting, particularly in terms of the human emotions involved. I was surprised from the very start when the lead player and teacher messed up on her solo that introduces the entire song; throughout the entire performance nobody seemed entirely on top of their game, although we definitely did not sound bad. It was strange to find myself nearly tearing up almost as soon as I began playing, and I'm not sure quite why. I was a little nervous and at the same time very excited to put all the work I'd been doing into a performance for people to hear. As I played and thought upon this, the main thing I just kept coming back to was that I was just so full of emotion, of energy, and it was coming out through all different parts of me - my fingers, my wrists, my movements, and my eyes.

Afterwards, we put our kotos away and had lunch. In the traditional Japanese style room, which almost all community centers and schools have for things like tea ceremony and other more traditional Japanese cultural practices, we talked about the performance. The teacher spoke of how well we played, but how it was hard to hear ourselves from the stage (which was true), and the general feeling was...it just was. We enjoyed our bento lunch from Lawson convenience store and laughed and joked and spoke about ourselves and each other.

Some time after that, I ran into some of the members again and they invited me to have tea with them. We went to the section where they were holding tea ceremony in the lobby and took our seats. There we were served by some of the elementary school girls that I teach. It was cool to see them in a setting of cultural seriousness; they had practiced this ceremony I don't even know how many days after school, probably at their parents forceful urging, and now they were serving other members of their community, their elders and teachers, through a tradition that has been passed across ages and has remained, or become, a regular part of festivals and events across Japan. Also, it was a cool experience for me because it was the first time I've participated in tea ceremony as just a customer, someone going in to enjoy some tea and dessert with acquaitances, rather than a student abroad or a foreigner being invited into and led through a cultural experience. I think it was my third time doing it and I had a rough idea of how it all went down. (Tea ceremony is anything but just going in and drinking some tea. It's basically a whole routine you going through, or act out, as you enjoy the food and tea, which involves considering the people with whom you're drinking and complementing the maker/server by taking in and commenting on the tea cup's design, the dry tea container, and lots of other things.) So, I felt pretty at ease the entire time and could just enjoy taking in the whole scene and the company of the people all around me.

And that wasn't even what I signed on to tell you about. Haha, oh man, there is just so much going on.

The day after I mused upon the possibility of snow, the temperature dropped another 6 degrees to 42F and I was surprised the feel of snow bouncing off my shoulder onto my cheek. That day, we had light snow a couple of times, but it was incredible to me, and I responded in a way some might expect of someone who had never before seen falling snow. I smiled widely, looked up, and said, "Amazing!"

The next day, the temperature dropped another 6 degrees to 38 and I got a feeling of how this town was going to head into winter: nose-diving down a craggy creak. I'm actually really excited about it though and would never think of complaining. (Don't hold me to that). But, really, I just find myself thinking sometimes how cool it is that I get to learn how to live in a whole new environment, without any real risk to my person. I don't really have to worry about getting seriously sick or dying, and through this experience, I will gain the ability to thrive in a new kind of setting, against a whole new set of challenges. I find myself thinking more of, and praying for, people who deal with this type of situation every year, without the shelter of a home, blankets, or concrete plans for the future.

I've been enjoying devising new and resourceful ways to keep my room warm, my favorite so far being hanging a big, thick blanket over the two sliding doors behind my bed's headpost in hopes of keeping the warmth my body generates in my tiny space, rather than seeping through the thin slats of wood and paper behind me. Plus, it looks really cool and kind of trippy.















My first real change in the look of my house to fit my tastes.

So with two new scarves, two new beanies, five blanket on top of me, one blanket underneat me, one blanket behind (?) me, and plastic bubble wrap sealing my bedroom and kitchen windows tight (although the tape is regularly assaulted by the cold moisture that seeps through the wooden window frame and, uh, the wall itself...), I head into the oblivion.

I have been making some sweet soups lately, the latest (repetitive?) of which had an awesome combination of chili peppers and yuzu (something like a little Japanese lemon that has an awesome scent way cooler and stronger than the generic lemon). Basically, I've been experimenting with different ways to stew potatoes (oh my gosh I love them so much), bell peppers (the latest batch I bought was all different splotches of ripeness in red, green, and yellow), daikon, cabbage, konyaku (delicious Japanese...-ness, I really don't know what it's made out of...some kind of vegetable extract?), carrots, and now mochi (it makes the whole concoction a lot thicker). I've used both konbu and "Japanese" soup stock now to great results and am casually thinking of what kind of delicious combination into which to delve next.

I also made oden, one of my favorite Japanese foods, a while ago. It was really good, but I think it would be better without so much broth, and maybe if I cut down on the amount, variation, or size of the things I put it in. Still, it was nice.

In other news, I've been on the move musically. Not necessarilly through different kinds; mostly just through the same albums over and over again, Microcastle and Weird Era Cont. Deerhunter is definitely the main band defining my life, or experiences (if those two are different...?), at the moment, and I've been getting a lot of good, undercover ideas, or influence, from them. I wish I could see them the 25th in L.A. I'm pretty sure it would be one of the best shows of my life, hah.

I've also been getting back into some good Chicano oldies, like WAR and Thee Midniters. I love the feeling of getting into my Chicano oldies. It just feels...good, haha. It's cultural pride, love for my gente, passion for la raza, childhood memories, good beats, and awesome energy through the music into my ears and pumped through my heart. It flows in my veins and stimulates my mind. It feels like a family gathering, a birthday, grandmas, aunties, children slipping down blow-up water slides, green grass and brown benches, brown skin, and light skin, and opening a little bit of your presents when it turns 12 o'clock on Christmas morning. I suppose it's my family that I love most of all - the people who live with me in the same house, the ones who live in the cities 20 minutes down the 210 and 60, and the ones I meet for the first time hanging out with my cousin, going to see a show with my sister, or marching in a demonstration. Damn, it's good to be Chicano.

I've got a lot more to say about that, so you can just look forward to that in the near future. Circulating through my brain's space are ideas about being Chicano in Japan, looking more into my own history, and some new ideas about what I want to do. Hint: they now include studying keyboard instruments in France, finding out just how I want to make myself helpful to people in the world, and the idea that if I really do have a natural tendency toward creative expression I should pursue it and delve into what I may be good at. So it seems thinking of my future draws some things into clarity and expands others into pure whim. Cool. I like that.